There’s nothing simple about relationships. They evolve and change as the people in them do, they are constantly reshaped and challenged by societal norms, expectations, limitations, and life battles. Despite the odds, we let ourselves get fooled by someone’s charm and we connect with that person for longer than we should, so emotions begin to brew, and we find ourselves stuck, if not addicted to the one person that’s making us miserable.
What we like or dislike in a relationship might change, but how people treat us should never lead to certain outcomes, including disrespect, emotional or physical abuse, and other torments that occur on a daily basis for people who have been devoted to a toxic person. If you recognize certain toxic “qualities” in your partner and you’re beginning to experience those initial issues in your relationship, here are a few reminders of what your future may hold, so that you can be motivated a bit more to find closure and end the relationship sooner rather than later. Alternatively, asking for help is always a reliable way to put yourself first.
Changing your mindset
Happiness is a subjective concept, one we all create depending on our preferences and expectations, but it’s impossible to feel happy or safe in a relationship in which someone constantly berates you, manipulates you, and possibly even behaves aggressively or violently towards you. Constant fear, negativity, and lack of affection and basic respect will not just change how you perceive that relationship and that person, but also your outlook on life and all other people around you.
Most people coming out of a toxic relationship will have a much harder time developing trust in future relationships, not to mention connecting emotionally and physically with other potential partners. In many cases, people will develop some forms of anxiety and even depression.
Putting yourself in harm’s way
Unfortunately, toxic relationships might start out seemingly benign, but they often lead to abuse and violence. In Australia, stats shown that one woman per week on average is murdered by her partner, whereas 40% of women continue to be abused even after they are separated from their partner. That puts toxicity in a whole new perspective, and it means that more people need to understand the necessary preventative steps even when they decide to leave a toxic relationship.
Ending a toxic relationship can be difficult and dangerous. You might even have to use physical force to defend yourself as most abusers don’t take rejection well. In such cases, local women can seek help from a reputable criminal defence group in Parramatta in order to prepare themselves for potential counter suits that the abuser might press against them out of spite or in an attempt to reestablish some sense of control. It never hurts to talk to your legal representative and prepare yourself so that you can reduce the risk of abuse and violence when the time comes to ask for a divorce or break up.
Endangering your health
You know how when you get nervous before a performance or an important presentation, you might feel slightly nauseated or you get a slight headache and your heart might race? Your body reacts to stress physically and immediately, and when you are constantly stressed, your body will literally experience long-term health problems as a result.
Some of the most common reactions include gastrointestinal problems, but also hormonal imbalances pushed by the excess of cortisol in your system. You’ll also find yourself either constantly exhausted, or completely drained but unable to fall asleep, which might lead to insomnia and other chronic problems such as hypertension.
Ruining your self-esteem
In addition to physical abuse and aggression, toxic bonds are commonly based on emotional abuse as well. Some of the most common forms of emotional abuse include neglect, humiliation, shaming, belittling, and they can all lead to severe self-esteem and confidence issues down the line.
Although physical disorders commonly linked to relationship abuse can be more than enough to impact your self-perception, even if your body comes out unscathed, the internal scars of what you’ve been through will certainly have a lasting effect on your confidence. In such instances, people look for help and guidance of professional psychologists and they can join support groups in their community to share their worries and slowly restore their lives back to normal.
We can all learn from our mistakes and poor choices, but the greatest challenge in toxic relationships is to recognize the benefit of ending them and actually going through with that final act of breaking up. Truth be told, toxic relationships can come from family members, too, and it can be all the more difficult to rectify the situation or come out harm-free. But it’s always up to you to start evaluating those bonds and recognize when it’s time to leave.